This Statement Is A Lie

Status Report

Mon, 21 Dec 2009 22:38:19 GMT

Made it home from Boston almost incident-free. The one-day road trip became a two-day road trip, and I got into a minor accident (no, I'm not hurt, no, the damage to the car wasn't that serious, yes, it's in the shop now, yes, I'm fine), but overall I'm good.

Winter break is a lot more enjoyable when you don't have to worry about upcoming exams.

I'm old.

That is all.

Holy shit

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 20:23:30 GMT

For those of you who took AP US back in 2002:

Remember heading down to the national mall after the exam? And the sketchy guy who was selling "Kama Sutra" necklaces near the carousel?

I was looking for a watch in my jewelry box. Turns out, I still have that cheap-ass necklace.

Go-To Chocolate Bundt Cake with Milk Chocolate Glaze

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 06:17:46 GMT

I love this recipe. I needed something relatively quick and painless for a dinner party the other day, and this did the trick. It's nothing more than the "Hershey's Perfectly Chocolate Cake" recipe with a nice, buttery milk chocolate glaze on top. It's simple, wonderfully moist, and a perfect counterexample to those who deride "back of the box" recipes.

The glaze recipe is from Southern Living. I found the glaze a little too buttery on its own (note that both the boyfriend and the roommate disagreed and loved it), but I thought it went perfectly atop the cake. If you prefer a different glaze, dark or white chocolate can easily be substituted for the milk.

Without further ado, here's the recipe. Enjoy!

Chocolate Bundt Cake

Ingredients
2 cups sugar
1-3/4 cups all-purpose flour
3/4 cup natural cocoa (not Dutch-process)
1-1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1-1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 cup milk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 cup boiling water

Directions
(1) Grease and flour 12-cup Bundt pan. Heat oven to 350°F.

(2) Stir together sugar, flour, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda and salt in large bowl. Add eggs, milk, oil and vanilla; beat on medium speed of mixer 2 minutes. Stir in boiling water (batter will be thin). Pour batter into prepared pan.

(3) Bake 50 to 55 minutes. Cool 15 minutes; remove from pan to wire rack. Cool completely.

Milk Chocolate Glaze

Ingredients
4 ounces chopped milk chocolate (I used a Ghirardelli milk chocolate baking bar)
1/4 cup whipping cream
2 tablespoons butter, softened

Preparation
Microwave chopped milk chocolate and whipping cream at HIGH in a 2-cup glass measuring cup 30 seconds to 1 minute or until melted, stirring twice. Whisk in butter until blended. Stir well, then pour over cooled cake immediately.

Facepalm

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 02:56:19 GMT

Matt's quote of the day:
"If you watch Jeopardy backwards, it's rich people paying a lot of money for stupid answers! It's amazing!"

Pound Cake

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 19:36:53 GMT

From Smitten Kitchen, Vanilla Bean Pound Cake. It is amazing.

(Note: If you don't have vanilla bean on hand, go ahead and add another 1.5 teaspoons of vanilla extract. It's not quite as good, but still delicious.)

Deliciously Soft Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies

Sun, 18 Oct 2009 03:59:40 GMT

These cookies are delicious. Pretty basic recipe, but good to have in your stash.

Soft Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies
Adapted from Allrecipes.com

Ingredients
1 cup butter, melted
1 cup white sugar
1 cup packed brown sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
3 cups quick cooking oats*
2 cups semisweet chocolate chips

*Quick-cooking oats make for a softer cookie. For a grainier cookie with a more distinct oatmeal flavor, use old-fashioned oats.

Directions

1. In a medium bowl, whisk together butter, white sugar, and brown sugar. Beat in eggs one at a time, then stir in vanilla. Combine flour, baking soda, salt, and cinnamon; stir into the creamed mixture. Mix in oats and chocolate chips. Cover, and chill dough for at least a half-hour.

2. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Grease cookie sheets. Scoop dough a rounded tablespoon at a time and roll into balls. Place 2 inches apart on cookie sheets.

3. Bake for 8 to 10 minutes in preheated oven. Allow cookies to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely (or eat them when they're not quite cool enough, like I did. Totally worth it.)

In other news, Matt's Quote of the Day:
Blinking? Yes, yes, I know you're very blinky. But blinking doesn't do anything! You're supposed to give us the internets! I can't interpret your blinks!
~Matt, yelling at our new router

boiz n gurlz

Mon, 31 Aug 2009 00:13:28 GMT

Top ten hilarious/awesome things about having a boy for a roommate:
(1) He doesn't think it's weird when I say, no, we don't need a chore schedule, we can just clean up when the place starts to gross us out. We're not five years old.
(2) He has so little bathroom stuff I can take over massive portions of the medicine cabinet.
(3) Similarly, I can use the bathroom for rather extended periods of time and not worry that he needs to come in and blowdry his hair or something.
(4) Our genders are incredibly obvious from our respective rooms. My right wall is dominated by drawers of clothing. His is dominated by a very large desk that contains two computers and two very large monitors, with a third computer/server under his desk.
(5) I can take over the kitchen with all my baking stuff. Does he get annoyed that he can't find room for his stuff? No, he's just happy because it means he gets to be a guinea pig for my baking experiments.
(6) His pride will not allow us to outsource any electrical work. Yesterday, he drilled a hole in a metal cover so we could install an overhead light into our ceiling fan. He also changed an outlet, and is currently in the process of running electrical cables throughout the apartment.
(7) He doesn't find my frequent lack of pants strange. (And no, there isn't any sexual tension between us. We're just both lazy.)
(8) He brought a TV with him. By contrast, neither of us feel particularly pressed to pick out a couch just yet.
(9) He and the boy are conspiring to set up a distillery on my porch. This provides the rare opportunity where I get to be the voice of reason.
(10) I don't have to worry about some other dumb bitch's pheromones screwing with my cycle.

Addendum: Matt's Playtex Tampon Rant:
"You know what I learned from your tampon box? Playtex tampons are made by Energizer batteries. ENERGIZER BATTTERIES! It's like sticking a battery in your pussy! I mean, there could be a mixup at the factory and you would end up sticking a battery in your vagina. It's heavier, so I guess you'd notice, but still. Also, why do they measure the amount of blood in grams? Who the hell has a concept of blood lost in grams?"
My response: "Why the fuck were you looking at my tampon box?"
Him: "Cause I needed bathroom reading."

OMFG Dessert!

Sat, 01 Aug 2009 23:23:18 GMT

Bittersweet Chocolate Pear Cake, recipe courtesy of Smitten Kitchen

So. Effin'. GOOD.

Birthdays

Thu, 21 May 2009 20:04:31 GMT

Birthday parties are weird. It's like, woohoo, you defied the odds and managed make it another year without croaking. Here's a bunch of useless crap you're going to regift. Enjoy.

But at least there's booze. Yay booze.

Sun, 26 Apr 2009 05:04:12 GMT

Ripped from littpiski

Comment here with anything, and I will say something nice to you.

Just make this post in your lj, so you can spread love too.

Motorcycle Lessons

Tue, 07 Apr 2009 15:00:39 GMT

Hey all,

So I know I said I would do this last summer, but never got around to it. This summer, though, no excuses! I'm going to get a damn motorcycle license, even if I'm not going to get the chance to use it right away. Of course, this requires taking a safety course.

The classes are at Montgomery College. I'm thinking of taking the session that runs from May 19 to May 21. Any thoughts? Would anyone be interested in joining me?

"Black Magic" Indeed

Sat, 04 Apr 2009 19:38:41 GMT

Come on. Are you really going to complain about another chocolate cake recipe?
This is much simpler than the double-chocolate cake recipe below. It's an adaptation of a recipe from the Hershey's website. If you like very moist cakes, then this is the cake for you. Enjoy.

Black Magic Cake

Ingredients:
2 cups sugar
1-3/4 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1 cup strong black coffee OR 2 teaspoons instant coffee plus 1 cup boiling water
3/4 cup unsweetened cocoa (not Dutch-process)
2 eggs
1 cup buttermilk or sour milk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Directions:
1. Heat oven to 350°F. Grease and flour two 9-inch round baking pans.
2. Stir together sugar, flour, baking soda, baking powder and salt in large bowl.
3. Dissolve the cocoa in the hot coffee. Stir until you have a thick paste.
4. Add coffee/cocoa mixture, eggs, buttermilk, oil and vanilla to the dry ingredients; beat on medium speed of mixer 2 minutes (batter will be thin).
5. Bake 30 to 35 minutes for round pans, or until wooden pick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes; remove from pans to wire racks. Cool completely. Frost as desired. Yields 10 to 12 servings.

VARIATIONS:
ONE-PAN CAKE: Grease and flour 13x9x2-inch baking pan. Heat oven to 350° F. Pour batter into prepared pan. Bake 35 to 40 minutes. Cool completely. Frost.

THREE LAYER CAKE: Grease and flour three 8-inch round baking pans. Heat oven to 350°F. Pour batter into prepared pans. Bake 30 to 35 minutes. Cool 10 minutes; remove from pans to wire racks. Cool completely. Frost.

BUNDT CAKE: Grease and flour 12-cup Bundt pan. Heat oven to 350°F. Pour batter into prepared pan. Bake 50 to 55 minutes. Cool 15 minutes; remove from pan to wire rack. Cool completely. Frost.

CUPCAKES: Line muffin cups (2-1/2 inches in diameter) with paper bake cups. Heat oven to 350°F. Fill cups 2/3 full with batter. Bake 22 to 25 minutes. About 30 cupcakes.

Should I have?

Fri, 03 Apr 2009 07:18:40 GMT

I have to wonder.

Have I changed at all since high school?

Fri, 03 Apr 2009 02:48:56 GMT

I just signed an email to my dad "Mel."

Wow

Mon, 30 Mar 2009 04:10:21 GMT

Today's xkcd is all sorts of awesome.

That is all.

Note: Read the scroll-over text. That makes it about ten times better.

I must be stopped (aka Blueberry Muffins)

Thu, 26 Mar 2009 16:48:50 GMT

This baking thing is getting out of hand. -_-

This recipe for blueberry muffins has been weighing on my mind for quite some time now. I finally baked them this morning, and good lord are they tasty. For the blueberries, I would recommend frozen over fresh; they seem to bake up more nicely without running. Did I mention that these muffins are frightfully tasty? (Not to sound like an ad, but I used Wyman's Frozen Wild Blueberries, and was very happy with the results. As Baking Illustrated explained, wild blueberries are smaller and seem to have a bit more flavor than cultivated berries.)

Blueberry Muffins
From Baking Illustrated

When making the batter, be sure to whisk vigorously in step 2, then fold carefully in step 3. You should not see large pockets of flour in the finished batter, but small occasional sprays may remain. A large spoon sprayed with nonstick cooking spray ensures clean dispensing when transferring the dough to the cups in the muffin tin.

Ingredients
2 cups (10 ounces) unbleached all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 large egg
1 cup (7 ounces) sugar
4 tablespoons (1/2 stick) unsalted butter, melted and cooled slightly
1 1/2 cups (10 ounces) sour cream
1 1/2** cups (7 1/2 to 8 ounces) frozen or fresh blueberries, preferably wild.

Makes 12

Directions
1. Adjust an oven rack to the middle position and heat the oven to 350 degrees. Line a standard 12-cup muffin tin with paper baking cups and set aside.
2. Whisk the flour, baking soda, and salt together in a medium bowl until combined. Whisk the egg in a second medium bowl until well-combined and light colored, about 20 seconds. Add the sugar and whisk vigorously until thick and homogeneous, about 30 seconds; add the melted butter in 2 or 3 additions, whisking to combine after each addition. Add the sour cream in 2 additions, whisking just to combine.
3. Add the berries to the dry ingredients and gently toss just to combine. Add the sour cream mixture and fold with a rubber spatula until the batter comes together and the berries are evenly distributed, 25 to 30 seconds. (Small spots of flour may remain and the batter will be thick. Do not overmix.)
4. Using a large spoon sprayed with nonstick cooking spray, divide the batter among the muffin cups. Bake until the muffins are light golden brown and a toothpick or skewer inserted into the center of a muffin comes out clean, 25 to 30 minutes, rotating the pan from front to back halfway through the baking time. Remove the muffins to a wire rack and cool 5 minutes. Serve as is or use the topping below.

Cinnamon-Sugar-Dipped Blueberry Muffins
While the muffins are cooling, mix 1/2 cup sugar and 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon in a small bowl and melt 4 tablespoons butter in a small saucepan. After the baked muffins have cooled five minutes, working one at a time, dip the top of each muffin in the melted butter and then cinnamon sugar. Set the muffins upright on a wire rack; serve.

**I followed the recipe on this one and used 1 1/2 cups of berries, which I thought was just fine. If, however, you really like your muffins packed with blueberries, you'd probably be okay upping the amount to 2 cups. I definitely wouldn't go above that, though.

[EDIT] You can adapt this easily for chocolate chip muffins. Substitute 2 cups chocolate chips for blueberries. For the topping, use 1 teaspoon unsweetened cocoa powder in place of cinnamon.

Red Velvet Cupcakes

Wed, 25 Mar 2009 04:33:32 GMT

I'm going to say this right off the bat: I think red velvet cake is overrated.

First, I'm offended by the minimal chocolate flavor in red velvet cake. This may be because I am a chocolate addict; I mean, really, four tablespoons of cocoa mixed with over two cups of flour? I managed to get over this particular hangup by realizing that red velvet cake isn't really a chocolate cake; rather, the cocoa is meant to add a depth of flavor to an otherwise basic cake.

Second, speaking of flavor, I find red velvet somewhat lacking. It doesn't have the decadence of a chocolate or devil's food cake, the buttery goodness of yellow cake, the yummy vanilla-and-almond flavor of a proper white cake, or the sweet delicacy of angel food. As far as taste goes, it seems that red velvet cake is best conceived of as a vehicle for frosting.

Something red velvet cake does have going for it is moistness. Between the buttermilk, vinegar, and vegetable oil, the cake tends to be remarkably moist. This is the biggest argument for avoiding the temptation of adding more cocoa powder, which tends to have a drying effect on baked goods.

Alright, enough analysis. Here's my recipe for red velvet cupcakes.

Makes 24 cupcakes

Ingredients:
4 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
2 ounces red food coloring
1 cup buttermilk
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup oil
2 cups white sugar
2 eggs
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour, sifted
1 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon white vinegar

For the Cream Cheese Frosting:
1 package (8 oz) cream cheese, softened
1 stick butter, softened
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups confectioners' sugar, sifted

Directions:
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Line 2 (12-cup) muffin pans with paper baking cups.
In a medium mixing bowl, sift together the flour, sugar, baking soda, salt, and cocoa powder. In a large bowl gently beat together the oil, buttermilk, eggs, food coloring, vinegar, and vanilla with a handheld electric mixer. Add the sifted dry ingredients to the wet and mix until smooth and thoroughly combined.
Divide the batter evenly among the cupcake liners so each is about 2/3 filled. Bake in oven for about 20 to 22 minutes, turning the pan once, half way through. Test the cupcakes with a toothpick for doneness. Remove from oven and cool completely before frosting.

For the Cream Cheese Frosting:
In a large mixing bowl, beat the cream cheese, butter and vanilla together until smooth. Add the sugar and on low speed, beat until incorporated. Increase the speed to high and mix until very light and fluffy.

Yes, another recipe

Wed, 25 Feb 2009 21:32:11 GMT

A bit of a shift from your standard cupcakes.

Orange Cupcakes
2 1/2 cups flour
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
8 oz (2 sticks) unsalted butter, slightly softened
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 eggs, room temp.
3 egg yolks, room temp.
2 tsp vanilla extract
Zest of one orange, grated
1/4 cup fresh orange juice
1/2 cup whole milk

Sift together flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Beat the butter on medium speed until creamy, gradually add the sugar, increasing the speed slightly until the mixture is light and fluffy. Add the whole eggs and the egg yolks one at a time. Beat in the vanilla and orange zest. Gradually beat in the orange juice on low speed (the batter may appear curdled at this point, but will smooth out after you all the dry ingredients). Beat in the the dry ingredients alternating with the milk and mix well. Fill the muffin cups almost to the top and bake in 350°F (180°C) for 18-20 minutes.

Orange Cream Cheese Frosting

1 8-ounce package cream cheese, at room temperature
2 cups confectioners' sugar
Zest of 1 orange, grated
1 tablespoon fresh orange juice

With an electric mixer on medium, beat the cream cheese until softened. Slowly add the sugar, zest, juice, and vanilla, and beat until creamy, about 3 minutes.

Tip: For lump-free frosting, you will need room-temperature cream cheese. To hurry the process up, place an unwrapped block of cream cheese on a plate and microwave it at 50 percent power for 10-second intervals.

Best. Chocolate. Cake. EVER.

Mon, 16 Feb 2009 19:02:36 GMT

I found on Smitten Kitchen, a recipe for the most moist, delicious chocolate cake ever. I played around with toppings and fillings, and came up with this.

Double Chocolate, Double Raspberry Layer Cake
Makes two 10-inch layers. Can make two 9-inch layers and about nine cupcakes, or 26 to 30 cupcakes.

For Cake Layers
3 ounces fine-quality semisweet chocolate such as Callebaut
1 1/2 cups hot brewed coffee
3 cups sugar
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 cups unsweetened cocoa powder (not Dutch process)
2 teaspoons baking soda
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
1 1/4 teaspoons salt
3 large eggs
3/4 cup vegetable oil
1 1/2 cups well-shaken buttermilk
3/4 teaspoon vanilla

For Raspberry Filling
1/2 cup seedless raspberry jam

For Raspberry Topping
1 pint fresh raspberries
Sugar to Taste

For Chocolate Frosting
1/4 cup (1 stick) butter
1/3 cup HERSHEY'S Cocoa
1 1/2 cups powdered sugar
3 tablespoons milk
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Make Cake Layers
1. Preheat oven to 300°F and grease pans. Line bottoms with rounds of wax paper and grease paper.
2. Finely chop chocolate and in a bowl combine with hot coffee. Let mixture stand, stirring occasionally, until chocolate is melted and mixture is smooth.
3. Into a large bowl sift together sugar, flour, cocoa powder, baking soda, baking powder, and salt. In another large bowl with an electric mixer beat eggs until thickened slightly and lemon colored (about 3 minutes with a standing mixer or 5 minutes with a hand-held mixer).
4. Slowly add oil, buttermilk, vanilla, and melted chocolate mixture to eggs, beating until combined well. Add sugar mixture and beat on medium speed until just combined well.
5. Divide batter between pans and bake in middle of oven until a tester inserted in center comes out clean, 1 hour to 1 hour and 10 minutes. (If baking 9-inch cakes, bake 45 to 55 minutes. Cupcakes should bake 18 to 22 minutes.)
6. Cool layers in pans on racks. Run a thin knife around edges of pans and invert layers onto racks. Carefully remove wax paper and cool layers completely. Cake layers may be made 1 day ahead and kept, wrapped well in plastic wrap, at room temperature.

Make Raspberry Topping
Mash raspberries in a small bowl with sugar until it forms a thin syrup. Strain through a fine-mesh strainer; discard pulp and seeds

Make Chocolate Frosting
Melt butter. Stir in cocoa. Alternately add powdered sugar and milk, beating to spreading consistency. Add small amount additional milk, if needed. Stir in vanilla.

Assemble Cake
Spread jam on one cake layer. Cover with other cake layer. Drizzle raspberry topping over top of second layer, spread evenly. Frost sides of cake with chocolate frosting.
(If you wish to frost the top as well, double the frosting recipe. However, I wouldn't recommend it - the cake is plenty chocolaty enough as it is.)

How have I not seen this before?

Thu, 12 Feb 2009 05:20:40 GMT

"My parents are DEAD!"

So much funnier than it has any right to be.

No conversation that starts with this can ever end well

Sat, 07 Feb 2009 23:52:04 GMT

"Not to support eugenics or anything, but..."

In which my imagination runs amok yet again

Fri, 06 Feb 2009 06:32:54 GMT

So I'm going in to see my Legislation and Regulation professor tomorrow about becoming a research assistant. Apparently he's got a big project on administrative law going - not sure about any of the details yet.
I'm fairly sure he's going to ask why I'd be interested in such a research position. My overactive imagination has led me to concoct some rather...bizarre possibilities for how such a conversation would play out.

Prof: So, why would you like to take part in such a project?
Me: Well, to be honest, sir, it's because I am a colossal nerd.
(Prof looks quizzically over his glasses at me.)
Me: Uh, not that I'm calling you a colossal nerd! I mean, you're certainly academically inclined, and, uh...I mean the useful kind of nerd, not the one who doesn't bathe and still lives with his mother at the age of 35.
(Prof continues to stare quizzically.)
Me: Not that thirty-five is old! It isn't! Just kind of old to be living with your mother. Which, of course, you aren't!
(Prof quirks an eyebrow. It is unclear whether he is amused or annoyed at this point.)
Me: Besides, being a nerd isn't bad! It’s not like the 80’s and 90's when being a nerd was the ultimate social sin. (I remember that, oh wait, Prof was in high school in the late 80's and early 90's.) Not that that's ancient history or anything! People who went to high school back then are still sitting around playing video games every evening!
(Prof quirks the other eyebrow. His lips twitch - it is unclear whether he is stifling a laugh or struggling not to lose his temper.)
Me: Not that that's the majority of people who are around that age! Or that video games or bad! Or...er...anyway, my point is, nerds are in! I think this happened around when I was graduating high school. I’m going to chalk it up to the pop-culture ascent of Jon Stewart. The world is being taken over by short nerdy Jewish men.
(I immediately realize that Prof is short, nerdy and Jewish. His expression remains fixed.)
Me: No, no! I like short nerdy Jewish men! I've had a crush on Jon Stewart since I was 13! I’m dating [Boy]!* He's a short nerdy Jew too! I find that attractive, really!
(Prof blinks and pushes his glasses back up his nose, as they have slid down well past the bridge at this point. He is clearly uncomfortable.)
Me: Oh, I'm not saying that I'm attracted to you! (I realize how that might sound.) Not that you aren't attractive! But uh, you're a professor! And that would just be inappropriate. Hell, even talking about this ridiculous hypothetical is inappropriate! And besides, I don't think your wife would approve.
(Prof takes off his glasses and begins massaging his temples, as though to alleviate the onset of a sudden migraine.)
Me: ...And I don't think I'd be a very good kisser with my foot constantly jammed squarely down my throat.
(Prof looks up again. He is clearly still waiting for a substantive answer regarding my interest in the project.)
Me: So, er, right. The, uh, administrative state is likely to undergo a massive overhaul in the new administration, and a proper analysis of the issues facing both regulatory agencies and the country at large is key to solving, or at least alleviating, the various crises facing the national government at this time...
(Prof shakes his head and emits a small sigh. I am well aware of the fact that he has not said a word since I starting babbling.)
Me: ...uh, not to get off topic, but is this whole conversation going to affect your willingness to be a job reference for me? Because...well, I don't think my other professors like me very much.

*Recall that Boy is in my Section, so he was in Prof's class as well.

This scenario might sound absurd, but keep in mind, this is the man who (thanks to my seat near the front of the class) has heard my impassioned Monday Morning rants regarding everything from DC traffic to FDA regulations regarding the labeling of white chocolate (because, really, you shouldn't be able to label something white chocolate unless it contains actual cocoa butter). He is also the only prof that knows about my pathological hatred of pandas.

White Cupcakes

Tue, 27 Jan 2009 21:54:33 GMT

So Baking Illustrated has a pretty awesome yellow cupcake recipe. I meshed it with the white cake recipe, and came up with something delicious.

White Cupcakes

Ingredients
1 ½ cups unbleached all-purpose flour
1 cup sugar
1 ½ teaspoons baking powder
½ teaspoon salt
8 tablespoons (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
½ cup whole milk
3 large egg whites (about 6 tbsp.)
1 ½ teaspoons almond extract
½ teaspoon vanilla extract

Makes 12 cupcakes

Directions

1. Adjust an oven rack to the middle position; heat the oven to 350 degrees. Line a standard muffin tin with paper or foil liners.

2. Whisk together the flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt in the bowl of a standing mixer. Add the butter, milk, egg whites, and extracts, and beat the wet ingredients into the dry at medium speed until smooth and satiny, about thirty seconds. Scrape down the sides of the bowl with a rubber spatula and stir by hand until smooth and no flour pockets remain.

3. Divide the batter evenly among the cups of the prepared tin using a 2-ounce ice cream scoop or a spoon. Bake until the cupcake tops are pale gold and a toothpick or skewer inserted into the center comes out clean, 20 to 24 minutes. Use a skewer or a paring knife to lift the cupcakes from the tin and transfer to a wire rack; cool the cupcakes to room temperature, about 45 minutes.

Fluffy White Frosting
½ cup vegetable shortening
½ teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups confectioners' sugar
1-2 tablespoons milk

Beat shortening in large bowl with electric mixer on medium speed until creamy. Mix in extract. Beat in confectioners' sugar, 1 cup at a time, on low speed until well blended. Add milk; beat on medium speed until light and fluffy.

Recipe Time

Fri, 23 Jan 2009 19:58:39 GMT

So that pretty white cake below?

Here's the recipe:

Classic White Layer Cake with Fluffy White Frosting and Raspberry-Almond Filling
Adapted from Baking Illustrated

Classic White Cake
2 1/4 cups plain cake flour, plus more for dusting the pans
1 cup milk, at room temperature
6 large egg whites, at room temperature
2 teaspoons almond extract
2 teaspoons clear imitation vanilla extract
1 3/4 cups granulated sugar
4 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
12 tbsp (1 1/2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened but still cool

Fluffy White Frosting
1 cup vegetable shortening
1 teaspoon clear imitation vanilla extract
1 package (16 oz.) confectioners' sugar
2 to 3 tablespoons milk

Raspberry-Almond Filling
1 cup sliced almonds, toasted
1/2 cup seedless raspberry jam

Makes three 8-inch layers
(Note - you can make this cake as two 9-inch layers instead. If you opt to do so, scale down raspberry jam to 1/3 cup and almonds to 2/3 cup)

Directions
1. FOR THE CAKE: Adjust an oven rack to the middle position and heat the oven to 350 degrees. Generously grease three 8-inch round cake pans and cover the pan bottom with rounds of parchment paper. Grease the parchment rounds and dust the cake pants with flour, tapping out the excess
2. Pour the milk, egg whites, and extracts into a 2-cup liquid measuring cup and mix with a fork until blended.
3. Mix the flour, granulated sugar, baking powder, and salt in a large bowl with an electric mixer at low speed. At the butter; continue beating at low speed until the mixture resembles moist crumbs, with no powdery streaks remaining.
4. Add all but 1/2 cup of the milk mixture to the crumbs and beat at medium speed (or high speed if using a handheld mixer) for 1 1/2 minutes. Add the remaining 1/2 cup of the milk mixture and beat 30 seconds more. Stop the mixer and scrape the sides of the bowl with a rubber spatula. Return the mixture to medium (or high) speed and beat 20 seconds longer.
5. Divide the batter evenly between the three prepared cake pans; using a rubber spatula, spread the batter to the pan walls and smooth the tops. Arrange the pans at least 3 inches from the oven walls and 3 inches apart. (If your oven is small, place the pans on separate racks in s staggered fashion to allow for air circulation.) Bake until a toothpick inserted in the center of the cake comes out clean, 18 to 23 minutes.
6. Let the cake rest in the pans for 3 minutes. Loosen from the sides of the pans with a knife, if necessary, and invert onto wire racks. Reinvert onto additional wire racks. Let cool completely, about 1 1/2 hours.
7. FOR THE FROSTING: Beat shortening in large bowl with electric mixer on medium speed until creamy. Mix in extract. Beat in confectioners' sugar, 1 cup at a time, on low speed until well blended. Add milk; beat on medium speed until light and fluffy.
8. FOR THE FILLING: Place almonds in a food processor and chop. Mix coarsely chopped almonds with 1 cup of the frosting. Spread half of almond mixture on top of first cake layer. Carefully spread half the jam on top, then cover with the second layer. Spread remaining almond mixture and jam on top of the second layer. Cover with the third cake layer. Decorate assembled cake with remaining frosting. If desired, garnish with toasted sliced almonds.

Friend Bailout

Thu, 22 Jan 2009 06:11:45 GMT

Ripped from melayneseahawk

Starkravingsane is providing FRIENDSHIP STIMULUS. The first five people to respond to this post get free socialist handouts from me. Something I will think up. For you.

As per the relevant statutes and regulatory limitations, the following caveats apply:

1) Satisfaction, like safety, is not guaranteed;
2) Request will be fulfilled by 31 Dec 2009;
3) The range and type of stimulus will be determined entirely by the Commission of People Who Are Starkravingsane (COPWAS), and may include baked goods, mix CDs, a short story, or some as-yet unnamed item and/or service; and
4) For the purposes of this act the Creativity Rations and Limitations Act of 1989 is hereby suspended with regards to COPWAS.

Furthermore, participation in the COPWAS Stimulus Plan requires stimulus recipients to extend similar guarantees to their clients/friendlists.

By posting below and extending a similar offer on your place of authorship, you formally accept the terms of The Agreeement.

-COPWAM

Note: Delivery of out-of-state recipients of the COPWAS Stimulus Plan will be determined on a case-by-case basis.